Hellsongs “Minor Misdemeanors” (Tapete, 2010)

Capital crimes

Heavy metal is one of the most enduring of musical sub-genres. This is not because of its musical worth, though some of it is excellent, but because of what it stands for. Blithely indifferent to fashion and any notions of cool, it is intensely tribal and an opportunity for people to stick two fingers up (preferably in a devils horns stylee) at the norms of accepted society. Denim, leather, hair to the waist, tattoos, headbanging, it’s a primal scream of rage and empowerment that pretty much every male (and more females than you might think) utter at some point in their musical odyssey.

Which brings us to Hellsongs and the excrescence that is “Minor Misdemeanors.” This Scandinavian trio’s shtick is what they call “lounge metal”, which basically means take classic pieces by the likes of AC/DC, Guns’n’Roses, Iron Maiden and so on and present them in a Mike Flowers lounge muzak/indie pop style. This not only completely misses the point, it lacks wit, energy, sincerity, indeed anything that makes any music worthwhile listening. Normally in a review the standout tracks are mentioned but here of course there aren’t any, though special mention must go to Alice Cooper’s “Schools Out”, a truly shocking and even inspirationalsong when first released, here reduced to a slab of stinking brie.

Utter drivel.

Date review added:  Thursday, September 16, 2010
Reviewer:  Jeremy Searle
Reviewers Rating:
Related web link:  Band website